I work now as a photographer.
This is great, but comes at some cost.
I am starting to lose myself as the photographer I was, morphing into something else. Something more pragmatic and predictable.
The complete lack of travel opportunities, combined with the processed nature of my work have both conspired to blunt my personal creative “burn”.
Like an episode of House, one where the patient has to be taken off all medicines to allow the real issue to show its face, I have been looking for what really calls to me when I have no other influence.
A surprise to me and to my wife, is black and white is calling.
I think it is the purity of the medium. I have to shoot colour as part and parcel of my job and to be honest, when working solely in colour, it is often more of a chore than a creative benefit. Artistic interpretation only goes so far, so when I do offer a mono version for work I have to back it up with a colour one, fully expecting that only the colour one will be used. Occasionally I am surprised.
In contrast to my work images that need to be on point, even documentary style accurate, I have the other side to think of. I need to pay attention it seems, to the opposite side of the equation, the purely instinctive and artistic side.
This brings me to the elephant in the room, my stalled book on Japan. My natural instinct is to do a full colour coffee table box, but now I am thinking of two books. One as before, the other as a more edgy black and white travel diary, filled with the files that won’t make the main book, but have their own place in the story.
Mono has the ability to promote an image up the artistic chain..
So, black and white.
The plan is to set up the Pen F, my only top tier camera not used for work as my personal camera. It has several draws here.
The sensor is different to the EM1’s, less noise taming, but crisper and grittier, ideal for mono.
The single shot AF is great, but poor for tracking, so for work it is no more reliable than an old EM5. It is also well suited to manual focus, especially with the forgiving 17mm, so again, a point of functional difference.
It also has the best jpeg settings for mono. So good in fact, many use them as is, but I will set them as a suggestion, both in the view finder and for a guide in post. Although the cameras jpeg lean is towards a soft S-Curve Tri-X tonal palette, a film I championed back in the day, my own tastes have drifted more towards a “hotter” FP4 film look (crisper blacks and whites), likely thanks to digital freedoms, so having both to draw from is creatively responsible.
The camera also has a dynamic, both in handling and cosmetically, that helps separate it from my work cameras, allowing me to think differently the instant I pick it up. The reality is, this camera is as neglected as my whole creative side, because it is just not a practical for a regular working environment. It is really the poster child of what is missing, so it is fitting that it be used as the catalyst of future growth in that area.
It is also relatively new (well, hardly used), so a long term relationship with it is possible. Beautifully built, but not “work hardy”, care must be taken with it. Considered care, just like the mindset of the image making it will be used for.
For lenses, I will turn to the ones that get neglected for work, and the ones that offer the most consistency and predictable character, my primes. The 17/45 combo with 25/75 as options.
We will see.